~*The+Best+Story+Ever+Told*~

Once upon a time in a dark and lonely house, a tall, dark, mysterious man stood there, wondering about how Christmas was full of joy. The man's name was Festus but everyone else called him G, for Grinch, like the one in the Dr. Seuss child's book. Now G had allergies, he was allergic to cookie dough. That made him even more angry at the holiday us Christians call Christmas. G didn't think that Christmas was joyful because of all the cookies, food, gifts, roast beefs, and happiness. Where Festus had grown up he had learned to his families customs and happiness = sad, sad happiness. One night Festus stayed in his dark, gloomy house with his cat, Rick. G had lost his cat, and eventually found him. Rick was sleeping in the middle of Festus's bed. G couldn't find him be cause Rick was a Black cat.

One night in the small dark, creepy house, Festus had started to devise a plan.... A plan in which to ruin the holly jolly Christmas in the The tiny town of ReckonVille, Nebraska. First he would cut off all the Christmas holly jolly things. Second he would burn down all the the local markets in town to ensure no left over jolly things. Third he would creep around town raiding the town of all the the holly jolly Christmas items. Then Festus would pile all of the stolen objects and food in the middle of the center town square next to the statue of Andrew Frank and set it a blaze. Lastly but certainly not last he would creep into the tree decor factory,murder all the workers and savagely blow up the factory.

On December 20,1961 in the town of ReckonVille, Festus set off to blow up the train tracks there for cutting off the the "jolly train'' from ReckonVille. The next night on December 21, 1961, Festus started his voyage around town to burn and destroy all the jolly stores and markets in the tiny town of ReckonVille. He burned every shop in sight with all the Christmasssy theme.to them. He burned shops, markets, market stalls, trees, ornaments, nutcrackers, gifts and presents, wreaths, yard ornaments, cookies, and everything that had do with the holiday! Oh how he hated it, it as referring to the so called Christmas. With as all the carin and sharin, the gifts and presents,the roast beef and ham with all the sides. All the banging on drums, cymbols, trumpets, saxophones, whoosOphones, and flutes. Oh that time of christmas morning, he would go angrier and angrier. Oh how he hated christmas...a lot.

The next morning people were stunned, horrified, scared, terrified and stared in disbielife. "The Horror THE HORROR" a random person screamed

"What am i supposed to do now?" screamed another

On the night of December 23, 1961, Festus was begining to ninja across town where the pile of Christmas things lay, In a moment he sent them a blaze. Then he turned around and crept down the road to the main entrence to the factory. He cluched the door handle and slowly opened it. Halfway turned ten minutes had gone by. Fully turned took Twenty whole minutes. He belatedly opeded the door. Twenty Minutes. . . . Forty minutes had gone by and Festus had only opened the door four whole inches. Another Forty minutes and he had opened the door. He took a step back to finish opening the door and a voice said

"What do you think you're doing?"

Frantically Festus turned around and a watch man had been staring at him.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" demanded the watchman.

"Uh- Opening a door?" replied Festus

"No your opening a-"

Before the Watchman could finish his sentence, a grand piano had fell out of the third story window and had landed on top of the tall, grouch, mysterious man. After that he was presumed dead. Not a person attended his tiny funeral in the tiny town of ReckonVille, except his cat Rick. And so this is the end, dead, gone, Festus's days of ruining christmas was over.

And the cat meowed "And so this is the end, even though you might not know, but i am sorry i have to go."